i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
Please explain to me why I only attract Mormon guys. Just explain that to me.
I think it's God trying to counter your lustful nature. Imagine if Agnostics liked you. You'd never come out of your bedroom.
Dude michael jackson died, guess he's not 'stayin aliveee' any longer.
Uh dude that wasn't a michael jackson song it was the BGs
Whose surfboard did we steal and why is there a wood carving of a pelican in the fridge where the beer used to be?
Apple Jack is not a good idea for breakfast. Whiskey can't replace milk.
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
All he wants to do is masturbate while I sit there with my big toe up his ass that is not even the worst part of it.
You're in a tuxedo, you can pee wherever you want.
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
And know that if I ever text "road head?" that it comes from a place of caring and not a place of heartlessness..
Do you think the firemen will remember me?
Yes. But you were sloppy, sobbing, and puked on two of them. You won't get in their pants.
I really shouldn't have to tell you to stop banging your lightsaber on everything while we are in college.
It's 9:07 in the morning and I am so hungover right now I'm about to take the kids I'm babysitting to mf'ing Popeyes bc that's all I want in this world
To be honest. I have two poptarts in my jacket pockets. No one knows. I am pro stealth.
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
Randomize
