I'm so over stopping myself from talking about my sexual experiences in front of children.
Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
How do I say to her "Have you eaten mango lately because my penis had an allergic reaction"
Do you remember peeing on the wall and then yelling at us to stop looking at your dick?
Just saw an ad for "Liver-aid" how has this not become a life changing drug for millions?
So... I'm really sorry I tried to sell you to random people in cars last night
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
Its gonna be a symphony of fucks
I was high fiving everyone. I even high fived with the wall for doing such a good job suporting the ceiling and keeping us alive.
I woke up and he was just feeling up my stomach. I felt like buddha and he was rubbing my belly for good luck. never again.
Seriously. What did you do to me. You have a monstercoooooock.
I can't believe I just typed monstercoooooock. Twice.
Might be time to reevaluate my life. Banned from red roofs inns. Apparently I puked in ice machine. 3 hotels in a year.
I took a sleeping pill while he was in the bathroom. Time for a game of how long can we bang before I fall asleep.
You are both horrible and amazing
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
Randomize
