So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
but he used his one phone call to call mom and wish her happy mothers day, that's gotta count for somethin
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
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You were pretty committed to that cat costume. Between pukes, you would meow and assure people that you just had a hairball you couldn't get out...
I stayed up for hours making sure you didnt pass out in a mountain of your own puke. But when I heard you yell AWWWW FUUCCKK, somehow I knew everything would be ok
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
Yeah. You can ask him out. We're just fuck buddies. My vagina will be sad but your heart can be happy.
N I'm drinking this invention I call "do-it-fluid" I had a bottle of vodka that was 3/4th empty, so I put in 1/4th rum, 1/4th tequila, 1/4th whisky... it's definitely the worst idea ever..
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I put xanax in the cake batter
Did you really? It all makes sense now.
Can I tell you that I just incorporated the spice girls in my sexting and you not judge me
Also, if he asks how he's doing orally I can probably ask if we're exchanging Christmas presents?
I just walked out topless, stared his brother straight in the eye, and ate all the rest of their cookie dough.
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
According to my Fitbit I was passed out in my car for 2 hours after she got us kicked out of the bar