There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
god, a vagina is an amazing trump card
the jolly green giant just puched the pope. halloween is the best.
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
there are 5 pictures on my phone from last night, 4 are too blurry to recognize and the 5th is you dangling a twizzler over your mouth, naked.
he told me my vagina was like a beautiful piece of salami
at what point last night did we decide it was okay to let me hitch hike to another bar?
Please just tell me how ugly she was so I can bask in the diminishingly small reassurance that might give me
I wasn't sure how he was going to followup "so,i shot myself.." i guess "w a nail gun" is the best choice out of what I expected
He fucked a girl named Oreo... He deserved syphilis.
i don't even know why we got arrested this time. i think the cops just like our company at this point
I feel like a Europe failure cause I'm coming home from the club at 3:30 and so many people are just arriving... Wtf? 3:30am People! Drink earlier!
It's a Tuesday.
I think all the stress in my life right now can be directly correlated with never winning a game of Bop It as a child.
Nothing says "class act" like eating acid in the middle of a Buffalo Wild Wings
I wasn't that drunk.
You were calling my cat 'Simba' and holding him up in the air.
Randomize
