i can now get sex on a playground off my list of things to do in life.
It's like God shit irony all over that family
Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
The girl with a dislocated arm just did an assisted keg stand. You will never have an excuse again.
if you just come over, i will entertain you
arguing about the color of your bong does not count as entertainment
We just reached that moment of the night when you start making cookie quesadillas. Party on Wayne
He wanted me naked, so I got naked. You can't hold that against me.
He ended our Skype call with, "I'm going to poop and then go play my ukulele in the park."
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
New drinking game: Drink while you Drink. I'll explain the rules when I see you, needless to say, it's not difficult. Unless you enjoy sobriety, humanity and life. Bestest.
You guys wanna start around 10:30 tomorrow?
We can start at 5am for all I care. You ask like I have plans.
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
These rednecks don't fuck around. This party is completely BYOB and we now have 6 kegs, 3 of which have already been emptied.
Randomize
