Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
Unless you watched your mom's very literal rendition of "I touch myself" while she was wearing a bikini, your vacation wasn't as bad as mine.
i told him to take shots to cure a hangover and he told me i was "walking the steppingstones to alcoholism"
You're having sex and i just smoked and made oatmeal...i'll give you some time to be jealous
If you dedicate your next bite to me, I'll dedicate my first orgasm to you.
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started her walk of shame as my mom and dad walked through my common room door...my dad held the door for her and told her to have a nice day
I wanna get "leaving my dick in charge" drunk.
I just found scrambled eggs in my shower. Thanks for that, asshole.
I'm sorry i ruined our friendship with a boner
I'm going to buy her a puppy, let her fall in love with it, then kill it in front of her. Does that answer how I feel about her?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just considered playing a drinking game with powerade with my sister so she would get some fluids in her. I do so well with sick people.
I'm not gonna lie. The only reason I haven't drank a whole bottle of crown tonight is because we only had 3/4 of a bottle left.
I'm like still hungover from the quinceanera.
Shoot me. Oh my god shoot me. My moms ex "likes assholes"
I'll start working on my manners when you stop using please and thank you in the bedroom.
When the nurses wouldn't let him smoke in the hospital he decided to just roll around on the floor.
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