He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
Well ya in hindsight obviously offering the cop a jello shot was a bad idea
so apparently i worked out for over an hour last night. drinking is the only way i will ever get anything done
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've heard so many rumors about me being taken home in an ambulance I'm starting to believe them.
Thou shall not celebrate other people's birthdays as if they were thy own
hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking if you had a pulse
I'm covered in mustard and it looks like I nose dived in to barbed wire ??? Was last night that good?
Ugh contemplating vodka and chocolate protein powder as this Capri sun and vodka isn't really cutting it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The power of my boobs compel you
I don't think I'll get invited back. I drunkenly told her that her kids would be perfect for a pro-abortion campaign.
So I totally had sex In a teepee last night at that wedding reception.
idk what happened last night but i just wokeup with nothing on but a necklace...what is this, the fucking titanic?
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
I just bought two 8 Balls of Coke from the chick nurse that stitched my leg together in the ER after my bike accident last summer.
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