ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
No - a douche bag is not a fashion accessory. They do not make Gucci Douchebags
She was drunk breaking up with me. All of my emails to her were coming back with UNSUBSCRIBE as the subject.
It was your ex but it was not eighties night, it was pudding wrestling. And either thank you or I'm sorry depending on the state of my pants left on the doorstep
Intramural soccer game tonight. Be ready for blood. I haven't sobered up since thursday
It's gay pride, I'm in my EMT uniform getting more girls than your straight ass ever will..
WHAT KIND OF SELF RESPECTING 28 YEAR OLD WOMAN WAKES UP IN A FRAT HOUSE?!?'
The cougar kind?
He said I looked like a ballsack and I tried to choke him out with my Ghostbusters pajama pants. Happy fucking Halloween.
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
THIS IS THE 11TH FUCKING COFFEE TABLE THAT YOU AND RICHARD CRASHED THROUGH.
I'm surprised me and Richard survived 11 of your coffee tables.
YOU TWO ARE BUYING ME A NEW ONE I AM PISSED.
Last night you referred to my vagina as a gym for your penis
When you're trying to sneak from the bathroom to your room with dildo, but it glows in the dark and suddenly your entire life is illuminated in the shape of dick
Ahh yes. I lost my pants and swimming suit and phone charger. And I've found out who has them all even while hungover. Successful day. Nice party too.
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
Randomize