he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
i just uploaded pictures of my nephew, and you & d puking in the same toilet. i think i should keep them in the same album. show my nephew what he has to look forward to.
he fucked my hip out of place.
there is no way i can order from that cashier at in n out after she tried helping me while i was drunkenly puking in their bathroom at 11 am
Well the nurse forgot to take all my stitches out, so my surgical tools are peroxide, kitchen scissors, fingernail clippers, a pocket knife, and 11 beers. Let's do this...
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
Only I would come home from a random banging with beer and watermelon
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
I'm at the point in my life where I'm trying to get guys I've fucked to give a ride to guys I'm going to fuck.
Because once my penis is in motion, it stays in motion unless another force acts upon it.
Everyone is speaking Spanish and this 300 hundred pound chick is talking about the time she got out of prison... Fuck this place
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
The magician guy on probation is here at the bar. I'm gonna get him to show me a trick
After you punched me you ran away and it took an hour to find you... On the wrong floor... Sitting alone saying "it doesnt make sense"
Fuck this virus. We’re finally back on campus but the bars suck parties are banned sports are canceled we eat in our rooms and can’t fucking hangout with anyone. I’m tired of virtual classes and involuntary celibacy
OMG IKR! It’s not college unless we’re puking in a toilet wondering if we’re pregnant or just hungover!
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