Locked eyes w/ her at mainstreet, and said 'yeah yeah get it!' From there we started violently making out on the dancefloor (I had a FULL boner, ps) and then I got her number
Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
Even my Mr Clean Magic Eraser can't make last night disappear.
I just took a dump by candlelight. I feel like a pilgrim.
I woke up with the wrong plaid-shirted guy in my bed.
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
I come back into the room and you're grinding with the person in the mascot suit.
Fat girl left in a hurry. Possibly had to do with the missing bathroom door in my apartment.
I just yelled at a bunch of girl scouts for yelling "cookies" to loudly. That hungover
She just locked herself in the bedroom with an unopened bottle of wine and a steak knife. Unfortunately for her fingers, I stopped giving a fuck two hours ago.
i actually texted him "nice to see you" but then there was a saved draft "i think about you when i get off." dodged that bullet...
Don't be alarmed by all the Dick cakes in the fridge. But please don't eat..i accidentally broke one in half you guys can eat that one. Its labeled free Dick
My roommate just walked in on him eating me out ..happy finals week right?
just woke up and had to check if i still had pants on, i really need to stop drinking
I don't wanna SLEEP with him, I want to start bar fights with him. There's a difference.
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