I don't wanna do a drive in or see a movie tonight. I wanna play some Golden Tee and butt fuck a girl in the bathroom of some bar and proceed with Golden Tee
That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
I can't believe all I ate yesterday was half a turkey sandwich and 20 finger licks of exctasy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
We are going to get high as balls and watch netflix
THIS IS WHAT BEING AN ADULT LOOKS LIKE
he's dressing as a chick for halloween. of course i'm gonna make him get his legs professionally waxed. how is this even a question?
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm about to eat a 2month old weed brownie I just found in my lax duffel bag. will you answer if I call you in like an hour and a half
I will run into the sunset with a fist full of condoms.
Um, when I went down on you it got stuck there. Still had gum in my mouth. Didn't exactly have use of my hands to assist
Why the fuck are you playing with legos?
Why the fuck are you questioning me?
He gave me a brownie at the beginning of class and now I can't feel my face.
I just walked in on Joel doing a buck naked tripod headstand in front of the mirror so he could see the bug bite on his balls
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