i mean you're really good at taking the morning after pill...so you could put that on your resume..
yeah, i think fast in a bad sitatuion and am able to react with appropriate measures
im trying to make cookies in the george foreman
You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
Getting drunk now, but later remind me to tell you how to crash an 8th grade grad party.
when you tell me you got me a birthday present, I have to assume it will show up in a drug test.
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
The Blue Grotto manager called. He asked me for your name and number. Apparently, on reviewing the videotape he noticed you consumed a whole pizza by yourself. He indicated that he has a tshirt for you and wants to put your picture on his eating wall of fame. Apparently, you are the first such person to complete this incredible feat of eating. Congratulations to you!! I am so proud.
There's a ton of international students in my suite and I'm just sitting in this chair with no pants on eating frosted flakes
Last night I dreamt that I sold my car and used the money to have wheels surgically implanted in my feet and legs so I became a human heely and I just rolled everywhere
I've literally exhausted all the videos on pornhub. It took like 4 years, but I've done it. I did that quicker than I finished college
I couldn't find the oven mitts so I used a thick stack of tortillas
I told him I thought I was pregnant and he told me he accidentally killed my bird.
Circle of life.
I don't want to be flamboyant (says the guy who bought a hot pink suit to be a flamingo for Halloween)--but I don't mind being a little extra.
Try sleeping with him.
Why is it that all my gay friends have that solution...
Cuz you will have an answer or have sex.
Randomize
