also, i may or may not be wearing a cape right now. hint: i am.
If the Four Horseman of the Apocalypse gang banged each other and had a kid, it would look like the creature I woke up next to this morning.
spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
Some guy on the train just glared at me. So I'm drinking tequilla out of a dixie cup. Go fuck yourself.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The more I throw up, the more I am remembering exactly what I drank last night...in order.
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
I was sleeping on the bathroom floor and thought a wet towel might keep me warm.
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
You know when you meet a penis that looks like it was made out of all your hopes and dreams?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Update: that felon in Georgia I slept with is now a police officer. What a wonderful world
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
I think I just did my first walk of shame. He sent me home with a watermelon from his farm. Southern one night stands.
I got propositioned to get involved with an engaged couple. I told them I didn't think my married couple would like me to see other couples...
I force fed him french fries and then proceeded to tell him how sexy corgi’s are … it’s safe to say he’s not texting me for a second date.
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
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