Firetruck pulls up, fireman jumps out n knocks on my door, asks "do you know where Johnny lives?"
Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
You cleaned out the gashes in your leg from hopping that fence with that whipped cream vodka, didnt you?
Oh my god. I'm sorry if i peed on you last nite. I am truly disgusting
Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
I'm calling in my "fuck at anytime anywhere" card. Meet me at my place in 20 min, wear your Waldo costume.
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
He added me to his contacts as 'boot and rally'...have you ever been more proud to be related to me?
I can't wait to tell mom.
Walk of shaming into my apartment. No one to clap me in. Come home!
I wiped my ass with some girl's sock, I would honestly admit if I hate Caitlin's sandwich.
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
And then he peed in my hair
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