great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
You're the end to all my bad dreams.
Did you have that reoccuring dream about me banging your mom again?
Aren't I supposed to sit on your face?
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
she thought Martin Luther king was a president at one time. I love knowing I broke up with my ex and this is what he ends up dating.
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
I'll just wear something slutty to the liquor store and hope for the best
that's your solution for everything
I know of an excellent nanny. A lot like Mary Poppins but way cooler. And likes pot.
he's dressing as a chick for halloween. of course i'm gonna make him get his legs professionally waxed. how is this even a question?
His penis looked like how I would imagine Satan's pinky finger.
I feel like Captain Morgan shit all over my hopes and dreams last night...
I think I'd rather see her get hit by a car in one of those Russian dash cam videos on YouTube.
I gave him a HANDJOB.
But then he finished from a handjob in under two minutes so who's really laughing?
Bro I just got a hand job playing tiny wings.. Hell yea
Well she's 'call Wayne Gretzky a whore' drunk so you tell me.
Randomize
