Who wears a wallet chain?!
you have to be so drunk to ignore a taser
finally achieved: got laid in the religion section of borders. thought you should know.
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
29 Petty People Reveal The Shallow Reasons They Turned Someone Down
Her legal name is Candy. Her being a whore is implied.
Some dude gave me a questioning look as I came out of the women's toilet. I just responded 'blowjob' and he understood, then shook my hand.
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
I don't remember anything past "we have 15 minutes to drink this keg."
Just stop talking to douche bags. How do you manage to attract every asshole within a 100 mile radius?
If i could answer that i wouldn't be so afraid to move to a more populated area
21 Horribly Evil Pranks To Play On Your Drunk Friends
My kids are NEVER playing in the park more than 2 feet away from me until they are capable of punching an eagle.
This isn't just a hangover. I can feel the blood moving through my veins, and it hurts.
IT ISN'T. I'M A LITTLE HIGH.
YOU'RE ALWAYS A LITTLE HIGH.
NO. IT'S RARE THAT I'M A LITTLE HIGH. I'M ALWAYS HIGH AS FUCK. THERE'S A DIFFERENCE.
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
On a scale from 1-10 how wrong is it to request "I Hit It First" at my ex's wedding reception?
Definite 12.2 but worth it.
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.