She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
I told her you were a premature ejaculator. She nodded and said "Really? Wow, how long's he been a Pilot for?"
you are both the best and worst wingman ever.
we got 12 live crabs and then we got really stoned and know we're playing with the crabs. thats nom watermellon nom. now i'm plaing with a crap whos such a gentleman
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It must have been an amazing night, I have "my pants are responsible people" written on my pants in permanent marker.
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
Siri just called me GayBoy in front of my family. I will destroy you.
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
Well I woke up and my arm was bleeding. And my blood is on the wall in the hallway.
Umm
No idea. I blame fireball.
Valid.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Best part about a crippling state-wide drought? Actually having a valid excuse for not showering
Every guy I've ever fucked is single right now
Pray for me
DO NOT LET HIM TAKE CONTROL OVER YOUR BOWELS
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
Come over here. Bongs and porn. I found the promised land
He told me my car had really nice leather seats right before he jizzed all over them.
Randomize