considering i was high when my dad made me pee in the cup i might fail this one
We lost the cork forthe wine, so we used a tampon as a replacement. I never loves tampons so much
This dude. Just lost. A finger. He asked us for tape.
So hungover. They actually hid easter eggs around me.
There's a 35% chance I'm still residually drunk from last night.
And you say you're not good with numbers...
You are a booty call, not a friend.
Girl. There is the cutest old gay here. He's approximately 100 years old and kind as shit.
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
You can't be friends with my side piece. Conflict of interest.
But I mean how many guys can say they get blow jobs and grilled cheese with football
I think curling is the best thing to watch when you're baked.
I found my wallet. Still have no idea when I put mad dog in my steel water bottle, though...
OMG LOOK AT THAT PIECE OF MAN
I haven’t trained for this.
Ok, there are marshmallows shaped like elephants
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
Randomize
