There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
I'm pretty sure I'm almost gay. Like, I'd do it if I had no choice. Like, if i were in prison I'd try it.
so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
they just named my boobs. Lefty is "Guenevere" and Righty is "I claim this boob for America"
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
Ya,, he does have virgin eyes. Thats a real thing you know...
Found my wallet. It was under my dresser with a note that said "good job you found me". Drunk me is an ass.
He is such a generous lover, I can look past the fact his name is fucking Bob.
all of these bad things happened because I didn't bring a shower beer.
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
You are telling me my dick tastes like a taco supreme?
I'm saying this "taco supreme" tastes like your dick.
I am texting my ex and my future boyfriend while eating fish and chips with my current boyfriend... How and when did I become such a terrible person???
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