I'm not really sure how I got home, but judging by this headache, i'm assuming it involved bourbon.
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
This is the second time in a week I've woken up with your bra in my bed and I've had to sit and think about how it happened.
My vag has a bald spot. That is so middle aged. Is this my midlife crisis?
I just feel like you're using me for sex.
I'm glad you finally understand the context of our relationship
It's been two days. I am still burping up jello. Everything tastes like jello. Everything smells like jello. I am DONE with jello shots.
there is a video of me on Facebook getting mad at a trash bin what the fuck was in your Pepsi
REWARD BLOWJOB!! STAY RIGHT WHERE YOU ARE I'LL BE THERE IN FIVE MINUTES.
I made a half way decent playlist
Im gonna call it "hanging myself"
i woke up in just my thong, face first on my bed with all the lights on. how hungover do you think i felt?
At one point I believe I was despencing medical advice while wearing a sombrero and a hulk hand
I like shiny stuff tho if that’s an emotion
I think I'm taking after my dog, I just want to hump everything
Randomize
