That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
How can she be afraid to give you a blowjob? It's not like your penis is going to turn on her and eat her.
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
is it weird that i blow-dry my hair and poop at the same time?
not any weirder than you telling me this at 4 in the morning
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
everyone has their kryptonite. mine just happens to be 18 year old blonde girls.
My professor complimented me on the well drawn penis on my face then asked if I would like a seat closer to the garbage can.
I have vomit stuck in my nose, you should come with a warning label.
I'm pretty sure that our Lady and The Tramp Red Vine moment was the farthest I got last night
He made me chicken tenders and margaritas in preparation for me to take a pregnancy test at his place later tonight. Like...seriously.
In all the years we have had drunk sex, have we ever done it in a bed?
Woke up in a house I don't know, with someone else's pants on, and wolverine hair, to my girlfriend yelling on the phone about the 4 girls I made out with last
Your participation in the democratic process makes me horny AF
What the hell was that?
Genius. It was sheer genius.
Randomize
