If Billy Mays did an infomercial on your dick, it still wouldn't get you laid.
Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
If relationships were based on ego stroking and meaningless sex, we'd be soulmates
is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
twelve hours since my last beer and i just blew a .08, time to go to the library
I'm starting to have hip problems from having my legs spread too often.
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
She said she had a surprise for me and sent me a video of her having sex with some fat dude. It was a mood killer
its the first football sunday and my boyfriend isn't excited. this isn't gonna last unless he makes me snacks and brings me beer during the game.
Amnesty Wednesday? I'm free to do dirty things to you and you can't laugh or judge?
It looks like you got dick slapped by the sandman..
They cut me off when I tried to pee in the corner of the bar.
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
You literally snort drugs up your nose and you’re questioning the brand of the multivitamin right now?
Randomize
