i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
Dude, it's gettin so bad even my fantasies just wanna be friends.
I saw two morbidly obese women get winded after fighting over the last motorized wheelchair at Walmart
These are the moments in life you observe a force greater than us at work
he referred to my room as the tit cave...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Bailey. He has a soul patch. Idgaf if he was an NFL player. Nobody with a soul patch is attractive.
We were pulling the glow sticks off of him and he just kept yelling, "my bones! You're taking my bones!" and asking me if I was on the crew team
It was all going fine until I had to chug that strawberita bud light. That really ended badly.
I just ate beer and cupcakes for breakfast.... maybe this fourth of july won't be so bad
I need to be drunk within 15 minutes of getting home tonight.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
I don't think it counts as a booty call at 6:30 pm.
What do I do with all this pork broth? I can't waste it.
CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
I woke up wearing nothing but my red thigh high socks and a blue wig. I have no idea what happened.
Fursuit judi Dench just stared directly at me for 3 solid minutes telling me that cats arent dogs and i believe her because if i dont cat jason derulo might try to have sex with me
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