And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
Zach says you can't see his penis until after we're married...not sure why?! Bt then he said he thinks maybe you already have on the wild animal night!
She ordered a salad and a budweiser. I love her.
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
there was some random girl that nobody really knew, standing in the corner trying to shave her armpits with a plastic butter knife.
Someone jacked my earrings off me or I threw em in the toilet again
I hate when that happens
I just lit a candle in my room using axe and a lighter, that's how bored I am. Let's get schwasted.
If I believed in "responsibility" and "having limits", I would probably say I consumed too much alcohol in the last 48 hours
One day, tell me please to stop buying shots when I'm overwhelmed. I might have just broken a tooth
Dollar Store pregnancy tests. For when you sorta wanta know.
They have marijuana tests too!
Must've forgot to hang up with her when I was telling Josh I plan to pop champagne if I nail her tonight. She showed up with a bottle and said "only if we can toast it with Josh"
I wish I could be happy with a nice Christian girl, but no, I need a hot mess who starts bar fights
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
The sex was totally worth how awkward its gonna be for the next few weeks
Randomize
