Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
She was blacklisted from the Uhaul center...what the fuck do you have to do to get blacklisted from a Uhaul center
On the couch having a debate with the dog over whether eating anothr sweet roll will make the hangover better or worse
He bought me a pink rose and a Plan B. I really like this guy.
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
I'm obsessing over hocus pocus right now. What if I change my Grindr profile to "come little children, I'll take thee away to a land of enchantment"
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
Were you drinking last night?
Because typically I don't associate the phrase 'Go sleepy time' with sobriety.
You were petting your bowl of cocoa puffs and shushing it softly while staring at the mirror
We had a moment of silence for all of the orgasms he gave me with his beard before he shaved it off.
Hiking for a first date sounded like a good idea in theory because there was absolutely no possibility of me blacking out. In practice, I'd rather black out than go through what I just went through.
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
Today, this cop risk his life to save me from a sink hole but all I could do is laugh, I was so stoned
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
Randomize
