Hahaha figures, hmm should I spank you? Or throw a cow at you?
Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
eating toast while peeing. You think this what kanye meant by the good life?
This guy just came in and told me how he bought a clock for his cat so his cat can know when he's coming home...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude..masurbate with cocoa butter lotion..its like cocoa pebbles just gave me a hand job
he doesn't drink and he's an emt - he'll be our dd for nye in exchange for a threesome tomorrow afternoon.
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
in a thick russian accent she said "im not so good with english, much better with dick"
So aparently telling your roommate you're going to spoon them so hard in the public place of their employment is inappropriate
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
no joke- she just sprinkled parmesan cheese into her champagne and slurred "I just need a little snack"
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
You've lost booty call privileges between the hours of 10pm and 8am.
Next time I take edibles I'm getting chipotle to cater the event
You know darned well I have a well-documented weakness for redheads, Subway and hand-drawn graphic novels.
It’s amazing such a big dick belongs to such a boring guy
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