she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
we're all still whores. we just have a theme song now.
i gave him the "yep, i was your girfriend's collegiate lesbian sex story" head nod
HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
I can practically hear my vag and my conscience fighting.
She started ignoring us once we told her we were out to celebrate your abortion. Who knew strippers could be judgemental?
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
Moral of the story is go have sex with a foreigner and report back to me.
Every time I someone I meet again from that wedding it turns into the "Oh your the guy who puked in the hallway and passed out in front of the elevator."
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
Because you hugged a homeless guy, and I paid him 5 bucks to give us our giraffe balloon animal back. That's why.
Im so fucked up I'm drinking baileys and coffee just to stay awake.
It's 6 in the afternoon?
So if your sore it's because you tried to tackle a tree last night. When I told you at the party, you said "What do you expect, I'm an athlete!"
That ass isn’t going to eat itself.
Not gonna make it. His stripper neighbors are playing a Super Bowl drinking game that involves removing my clothes
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