Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
apparently it's okay for him to stick his dick in my mouth but not to let me have a can of diet pepsi for the road.
Is it weird that I found myself thinking of that blue chick from Avatar while she gave me head after the movie?
i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
he said the way to his heart was through his stomach, i told him if he wanted to eat my food he had to eat my kitty
smooth operator
You threw a hot dog at his face...I wouldn't call you either.
All I had with a note saying that my shoes are in the ceiling and good luck.
I have two stamps on my hand....ones from the bar and one is from an aquarium...care to explain?
I spent most of the night convinced it was my birthday. But I was probably wrong, it can't be January, can it? I'm 90% sure its not. But maybe. The days have got shorter. Is this what unemployment feels like to everyone?
I just threw up over a bridge. I didn't even know there was a bridge in this town. Vodka is like a transportation device.
My hair is short now so it will be easier to give you alot more blow jobs
I'm going to take this text and frame it on my mantle
I would professionally fuck the shit out of her
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
Fine I’ll come with you but you better tell that guy to wear some longer shorts because the second I see a rogue nut I’m gone
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