I'm at the psychiatrist, and this lady is crazy.. she keeps yelling about how her HMO insurance gave her breast cancer? Adderall isn't worth this.
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
im giving 12 year olds life advice. this is probably illegal somewhere.
I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
Next time we throw a party together I would appreciate it if you didn't try to get my friends to hook up with friends of yours you know have herpes
I ordered a million chicken go wraps and they gave me five. Even when im drunk I can count to a million and know its not five. They fucked me.
Was almost hungover and got scared, skipped hungover, back to hammered. Fuck real life
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
You went home with a man in a loincloth
I just watched him leave in half a loincloth. Don't you just love Halloween???
Let's celebrate our freedom by getting high and doing stupid shit.
Just in case you blacked out, we had sex, you came in me, we need plan B, we fell off your top bunk, broke your roommates chair, i still like you, but i'm in pain and am going to bed
It's slightly odd going to a booty call during morning rush hour with everyone else going to work.
I can get weed and taco bell delivered but frozen peas and a loaf of bread are just too scarce, what the hell is wrong with people?
Randomize
