would you consider him our boss?
then technically i slept with our boss
i have a food baby... i think its a boy...
Remember when we did the egg drop from the Dyson building? Her vag is like that, except with a ham, and the ham doesn't make it. I'll be back to the apartment in ten.
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
full cup flip cup was not exactly the reason I wanted to tell the cops when I was sleeping on the curb
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
Its hard to hear the music in here over his nasal whistle. And his breath smells like old milk. I think I need more vodka, and he better be buying. You owe me.
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
I would really just like to get laid somewhere that's not on a bathroom floor at this point in my life
I'm not going to pass up the opportunity to be half naked and covered in glitter without facing judgement or legal prosecution. I'll be there.
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
Just did. I played that shit out so casual I deserve an Oscar. Or am Emmy, or whatever the fuck you get for acting like a boss
I can't believe you cupped pat's balls to prove your fake relationship