talking dirty on facebook chat is the new phone sex.
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
Should we discuss the rug burns on my back or just save that for a separate conversation
If she makes a move, pretend to have a seizure.
I realised my life had gone downhill since being unemployed when I was making key lime pie on acid at 3am Tuesday morning.
Well Its not like I planned having my potato launcher explode and burn off my eyebrow and eye lashes.. I still have my right eyebrow can't u just be happy?
Just put an ad on Craigslist for a fake groom... I'm sure only non creepy sane people will respond to it
You're invited to our X-games themed party. We have an ice luge and every time someone eats shit we drink. It's gonna be great.
Good news. That bum you thought that died is alive.
Aw don't be embarrassed. It was all good fun! We've all been there. You can't come to vegas and NOT get a little alcohol poisoning. That's like going to church and not praying.
Either he pets my cat or this deal is null
I would just like to say that I had morning sex today to the Hamilton soundtrack. So.
I passed out in my bed, but woke up on the dog bed,with no pants, snuggling with toilet paper and a bottle of softsoap. Ive hit a new low.
You texted me a picture of some random naked guy. Did you lose your virginity?
Randomize
