There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
I'm pouring my heart out in these texts and you're going around showing everyone???
So i looked up from her cooch and there was her ex-boyfriend
Awkward
Turned in a paper today on drug abuse. Chose to write about percocet. Just realized I started 2 sentences with "This amazing drug"
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
We couldn't get our shit together to go to the bar, so we're getting drunk and facebook stalking all the girls who have gotten fat since high school. Any names you wanna throw out?
He showed me one of his balls and said "this one's free. you'll have to work to see the other.."
A client gave me a bottle of vodka today. And he was hot with a beard. It's like he knows my soul.
Nope. Turns put my desperate group message for sex didn't work out.
Well you sent it to two guys who were roommates.
They could have rock paper scissored for it. My vagina = the prize.
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
Ur here to start shit and I'm here to light that shit on fire
this morning's inventory: a top hat, two empty bottles of everclear, half a slim jim, cigars, tiara, pot necklace, and some fishnets. and that's just my purse.
Which one have i been cheating ON and which one have i been cheating WITH if i met them the same night & have been dividing time equally?
Last night I actually told him I came with a washer and dryer
Randomize
