Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
The iPad is going to make my porn collection SO much more glossier... thanks steve jobs.
I only want to screw him when I'm drunk. Problem is I try to be drunk as often as possible
Things found in my vomit last night: cell phone, Von Hayes rookie card, a boot, my dignity
Drunk on Tuesday. Double fisting. Mmmbop is playing. Only girl in the group. Life is complete.
Are you wearing clothes?
Fuck no, who do you think I am
I think it's a scientific achievement that I can make jelly that is 95% vodka so suck it up.
My dad made a joke about you sending me strippers for valentine's day so clearly everything here is normal
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
Her ex was at the party her housemates were having. He knocked on her door asking how she was while we were going at it. Turns out they were trying to work things out. Don't think I'll ever forget his face when we walked out of her room.
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
You fucked him, didn’t you?
He showed up at my house with tacos, rum and a negative Covid test. Of course I fucked him. I’m just a simple girl that likes tacos, not Margaret Thatcher!
Randomize