I thought she had blonde hair
No, Gonorrhea actually
last night was a success...if success means i don't remember the guy's name and my panties are somewhere in the parking lot behind the bar
so high driving around just saw a woman in a pink shirt chillin riding a horse
so high at work that a 35 year old with his kids handed me visine and winked at me. you win with the horse though
Walked home this morning with my contacts in a shot glass.
First class.
Maybe your new years resolution should be not to fuck in Sears bathroom anymore.
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
the fact that i already established a hook up buddy for thanksgiving break is genius
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
But think about it. I could put her gold medal around my penis
Just fucked a MILF from Alaska. I love traveling.
I mean like if I stood up my head might pull me down like an anchor
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
I want to get a list going called "D list celebs I've kissed"
Would you still love me if I got a Whatever Forever tattoo? It's like the Emo kids' Live Laugh Love
Randomize
