Is it sad that the only reason I haven't lapsed into depression is that I'm prettier than her?
Nah, we all need something.
Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
its great to know that you distinguish your relationships on whether you can cum on someone's face
Giving me the bigger bowl of ramen isn't considered "romantic"
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
Carry on my wayward bro, there'll be beer when you get low. lay your neon tank to rest, dont you rage no more.
Aww. I feel like I need to kill a puppy just to make room in the world for how cute you are right now
Texas State Troopers call you ma'am even when they arrest you for public nudity and after you've puked on their cruiser. Country boys raised right.
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
We're both great liars, in committed relationships, and horny. Its the perfect storm of cheating
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
I'm starting to think my emotional health is declining because I was watching transformers today and legit almost started crying
I haven't lost it. I know I'm not a prophet. It was a joke.
After the edible you claimed you were talking to my cat. We're in our 30s now, what was once cute is now a liability.
I'm so gassy and it's your fault.
Randomize
