Ugh now I'll have to carry around an overnight bag to all the bars I visit tonight. but hey! maybe I'll meet a dude! And need it!
Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
Note to Self: No matter how horny, turned on or in the moment you are, never go down on your gf after she had soccer practice.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Doing laundry, just found a knob off your stove in my pants pocket. I don't know.
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
I was carrying around a bottle of Jameson yelling rescue me
All I see when I think of you are dancing penis angels around your head.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
HIS NAME IN MY PHONE IS JOSHUA DREAMCHASER I CAN NOT
NO SHAME NOVEMBER
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
I believe in your delicious
You know you have a problem when your man yells at you that his penis is not your personal play toy.
No, this year you're all getting coupons for things like "no yelling because you had sex in my apartment" or "the last beer."
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