have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
i fucked some guy last night. i called him nick jonas by mistake. i'm 24.
So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
My life is like the prequel to "40 Year Old Virgin"
I'm slowing backing away from her. I tried breaking up with her and it felt like I was clubbing baby seals.
im calling her cock vulture from now on
She's "threw gas on the fire to put it out" drunk. Come retrieve ur gf. Ps she smells like burnt hair
My heart stopped for a sec, but I snorted what I believe was cocaine off the floor, and I'm back in the fight
"I made out with someone too, but then he tried to fuck and I played dead"
I just wanted to check in on you and you replied with a selfie with your Coney Island waiter and the caption "after his shift we're dropping acid together"
Yes. I am out of condoms. I kept filling them with glow paint and playing with them when I was on mushrooms, which resulted in me having unprotected sex last weekend
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
I woke up next to my bosses toilet.i wish you had just left me in the neighbors yard.
You tryed convincing the salvation army bell ringer you could do the worm and face planted into the sidewalk... I put a dollar in the can for your performance
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