we are at a mexican restaurant and the tv is playing mexican porn. dad won't stop watching.
Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
Bought a water-proof vibrator. Rubber ducky is no longer the one that makes bathtime so much fun.
you lied. pity sex is amazing.
He tried to say "god bless your heart" to the stripper but it came out "god bless your pussy"
You didn't have enough money so you tried to convince the cashier that "four dollar foot long" rolled off the tongue better. Stop drinking. Immediately.
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
Do you think it'd be inappropriate to have an I'm Not Keeping My Baby Party the day after her baby shower?
The thing i'm gunna miss the most about college is peeing while brushing my teeth in the shower without being judged. You just can't do that anywhere else
Wat day did I have sex in my sleep? I just made a Dr appt for Friday and I want to talk to her about it
I only blacked out one night of three if that isn't fucking personal growth idk what is
I wish I were single again so I could actually have sex.
But truly, sorry about your empty vagina
Thanks boo.
Today is get drunk without showing anyone my penis day
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