used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
i wish i could just chop off my fat with a knife..i would rather endure that than work out
no, i'm proud of you. this is the happiest you've been since you discovered that bowls can be used as cups if you don't feel like washing dishes.
at least after i hook up with someone i have the decency to ignore them
just found more coke in my pocket. i love not washing my jeans after every individual use.
I just ran into the couch, vagina first.
I hope you got dinner out of it
they got in a fight during sex...she came out yelling and covered in chocolate
If i had 4 hands right now is have booze in 3 of them and my cock in the other all because you went to denver. just sayin.
It's all good. The CSI guy came and I played the theme song while he in was in our place. The cops even laughed.
I'm almost positive that you shat in a birdhouse
the only good thing about going home with him was that he was prettier than me.
Am I not being subtle enough by giving him a rainbow striped bong, during PRIDE MONTH?
That edible kicked in right as I was upside-down on that rollercoaster. Fucking.mind.blown.
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
It got weird the panthers lost and we started throwing wings at one another
Randomize
