he shaved USA in his pubs
Just saw a picture of your new tub, cant wait to pee in it
you wouldn't come out from under your bed because you said there were six-armed bears everywhere.
ohhh that explains the pepperonis I found in my sock drawer this morning...
no it doesn't.
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
She was wearing a shirt that said "Just Do Me", holding a half of a bottle of Vodka, and was screaming at her friends "PUSSY JUST SWALLOW!" before she chugged the rest of the bottle.
Dude, if you don't take her, I will.
I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
you took my bottle from me saying i was unprepared for its magical qualities. then you buckled it in the backseat.
He lectured me about the dangers of drugs while wearing a sombrero and doing interpretive dance.
Im about to get a baby alligator stoned, what are you doing with your life?
I had to convince someone last night that the fact that he couldn't get me off wasn't him it was me and to clarify I had to tell him there was only. One person that got me off every time without fail, he said "that guy is my hero" you should be proud
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
Definitely thought about throwing up in the cat box since it's not as far to the bathroom..
4 pharmacies and not one had Plan B. If this is gods way of telling me it's time for a child, he can fuck off.
So is he the one who got away?
They all got away. I’m a catch and release kind of girl.
What's the point of having a gay best friend if he doesn't play with your titties?
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