I've rolled joints bigger than that penis.
I'm starving. my midnight snack, aka a teaspoon of cum, isn't holding me over
You going to midnight mass? we need a dd
just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
Last night must have been awesome, my dog still smells like vomit.
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
I woke up spooning my guard tube. Tell me I'm not the most dedicated lifeguard ever
I'd like to thank you fucktards for dumping the WHOLE box of Tricuits in my bed after I passed out.
I'm not finished with being a sloppy white girl alcoholic. I didn't postpone having a husband and kids for sober weekends.
I told him you're making deviled eggs for the party. Sisters make deviled eggs to get their sisters laid. It's science.
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
Maybe i don’t have a tell. Maybe wine is my poker face.
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
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