So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
it's amazing how much more room there is in my purse when I'm not carrying alcohol in it
i came out of my blackout when my grandma called last night. it kinda sobered me up and i realized who i had been making out with. should i call and thank her for the defensive cockblock?
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
He keeps asking me for girl advice, i told him im an expert at getting drunk, not girls
My head weighs 7 pounds. i know this because i spent the majority of the night passed out in the bathroom, using the scale as a pillow.
Want to get high and go thrifting? I'm trying to succeed making my dorm look like a deranged Applebees.
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
Did I send you a naked snap the other day with a fat blunt in my mouth with the caption "$1200 bitches!" ?
I slept with the Australian in the bathroom of a gay bar. What has my life become.
You added his wife on Facebook?! You're horrible at this mistress thing
We didn't have a place to have sex. So we timed the automatic car wash & spent $9 for 3 minutes and 45 secs of car sex.
Someone threw up pink in the shower, there's a golf cart tipped over on the lawn and Cousin Brian is missing. What could Friday night throw at us?
Randomize
