Something in my vomit makes me think I shouldn't have had that slurpee
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
The waitress bought us a round. She said if anyone could do 52 margarita mondays in a row, it was us.
this is worse than the time i threw up a condom.
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
Gave him an awesome blow job on his living room couch last night, so at least he'll have something nice to think about next time he's watching the Tigers lose.
There was a tour on campus today, and there were two girls i went to high school with in the group. They saw me and ran up to me as i was unlocking my door. when i opened it, kate was laying in a pile of glitter and beer cans. We need to reevaluate.
he taught all the little kids to ski. it was stupid hot. i'm pretty sure my ovaries exploded.
A guy from tinder a while ago who sent me dick pics straight out the gate is a tech on my dad's hospital floor. I was wondering why he looked familiar and why he never took my dads vitals when I was in the room
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
It all started with a game of naked twister.
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
God yes pancakes and booze sounds like the best night ever.
Randomize
