Wow.. I was doing a mental check of my bank balance & I literally just said to myself: 'I have 27 dollars and a bottle of tequila til tuesday-ill be fine'
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook?
Whoever said that a man can only cum up to 8 times a day is a fucking liar...or was never on adderall
Howd you meet this guy?
I found him next to my pants on sunday morn.
100% of annual heatstroke fatalities are preventable deaths! Don't let it happen to you! Also, you can catch crabs from almost anything! Be safe and have fun.
could you please not use my mortar and pestal for its intended purpose? i just snorted cracked black pepper.
So my bf wanted to cum on my face and I let him. Afterwards I wiped some off, wiped it across his forehead and said, "The king has returned".
How do I tell my child he was conceived on a barstool in South Alabama?
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
Chilling on my porch debating between pre work drinking or video games and getting high.
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
im in DESPERATE NEED OF A COMPANION RIGHT NOW I’M MOTHER FUCKING TRIPPING SOLID GOLD BALLS
when I walked in the door they were passed out naked, on top of eachother, with tetris controllers in their hands.
I no longer have the means to support both a women and an alcohol addiction
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