So. Did i wake up at 430, try to drive home, stop to throw up at a shell, and try to clean out my car and drop my keys in a full dumpster? Yes.
Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
i feel like i want to date him just so i could be besties with his penis
I really wish I didn't have to wear pants this is ridiculous
you are my new fav person for making him do the walk of shame in pink footie pajamas!
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
You know when its a good night when you have to be reminded IHOP is a family establishment.
You got my ass fired just for knowing you
thanks for the bacon
looking at that huge scar on my leg from when i got drunk at 9 AM and walked into a grill. so excited for football season to start again!
Great. Woke up in Ts room wearing one sock, a glove and a beret with a sorrority chick CLEARLY out of my league. Jose Cuervo you ARE a friend of mine.
Like the friend zone has no room for winks
I told him you forbid me to sleep with him so he needs to accept that.
He's just been a dick since he set his face on fire. I just wanted to eat a fucking hot dog.
Went home last night with that hot British guy. Sounded like I was f-ing in a Harry Potter movie.
I wish I just waited long enough to hate someone to fuck one
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
Randomize
