I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
omg this kid i'm babysitting is making a penis out of playdough ahhhh.
He just rolled me a 'baby penis' as opposed to his 'big boy' penis that he crafted...he just demanded that I roll him a penis.
We were having sex on the balcony and this guy walked by, so drunkily i said "dont move, he cant see us if we dont move."
Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
The bar I'm at just passed out smores to everyone. I don't know what it has to do with cinco de mayo but I'm down.
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
im not sure what exactly happened but i may need help faking my own death
They switched jackets and you didn't notice. You made out with both of them and had no idea
Wearing the 'Let's Party' thong feels weird without you...
So, seriously. How does it feel to know that you're riding a cock that was in kindergarten when you were going to prom?
Less than a month to graduation and I'm still blacking out on the reg tonguing down the closest breathing organism preferably with a penis but I'm flexible, and still havent figured out how to be functional on Fridays. WHY don't they teach us valuable shit at this institution!?
I'm trying. I feel like we're trying to have sex with fruitcake. dry and boring.
What, I can't laugh at my sister being driven crazy by Facebook randomly assigning chat significance to the guy she lost her virginity to?
The stripper was dressed as the green lantern. Even for a geeky girls' bachelorette party it was lame ass.
I've been rehabbing my soul with cheese and wine lately
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