Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
two pink lines on a pregnancy test is bad, isn't it?
only if you didn't want to fuck up your life.
JACOB AND UGLY BROKE UP
would you object to me following you around all the time with a video camera and selling it to TV? Your life could make me millions.
I don't remember what your face looks like..
I don't remember your face either, just your dick.
If you would give me the chance we might have the two separate pieces of the greatest fuck puzzle ever.
A homeless man just asked me if I had seen any "nekkid chicks with heineken bottles run by"
Berkeley was the right choice
I think there's a website warning girls about me based on the 4 who approached me separately tonight and called me evil. Fuckyoudave.com?
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
If there is a heaven, that's what it will be. Bagel Bites and cunnilingus.
They filled a kiddie pool with lube and glitter.
SpongeBob is life. I once broke up with a guy bc he said SpongeBob was stupid.
hes sooooo boring!!! I feel like I’m in a relationship with myself now. I have an 8 inch dildo under my bed, THATS how much I’m in a relationship with myself.
Randomize
