Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
Don't put random dicks in your mouth or any other crevice for that matter... and i'm home in 30 seconds
Wish I got that text last night instead of this morning.
She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
Sunrise bitch. You owe me waffles
But I mean, have you ever just LOOKED at how majestic penises are? They are like ivory columns of pure wonder!
Just had a threesome. Girlfriend wasn't a part of it. Broke up with her by sending her a picture of it. Hell is going to be awesome
This may be the alcohol talking, but I'm pretty sure I know Spanish now
Hey does the gas gauge in your car work?
Nevermind...we figured it out. Heres a more relevant question, does your insurance have roadside assistance?
And now, by the power vested in me by the state of intoxication, I now pronounce you fucking awesome.
i saved a drunk oompa loompa he was passed out on the lawn and i picked him up figured out where he lived and put him in his bed and wrote his roommate a note
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
Randomize
