i hate that you can chart my weight gain through my facebook pictures.
Just saw a group of asian tourists in safari outifts bow in thanks to the starbucks guys. And no Im not high.
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
I drove to my yoga class while eating a piece of bacon. Wow. I see myself in a whole new light.
I'm covered in salsa and facewash. I think I'm doing something wrong over here.
He smells so good today
Seriously, back away from the sexual harrasment suit.
I missed rounds this morning...my senior resident hooked me up to and IV and made me stay in the clinic because he said I didn't look presentable enough to walk around the hospital
All I remember is laying in that secret hideaway closet, naked, with a beer cowboy hat on and you walking in and sitting down crying because no one would have sex with you
I just found glitter from our Father's Day party on my balls this morning.
DAD WTF
It's like the dark age of my sex life being stuck here
I put his pb&j sandwich in my bra and never looked back
I also told the bartender he probably had a beautiful spleen
Getting so old my power naps are turning into, "can I reasonably just go to bed at this time?"
wow bdsm is so cute
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
Randomize
