hey, what are you doing tonight?
sleeping, g'night!
but i wanted to see you :(
sleeping! g'night!(801): i miss you!
stop - you have a right hand - use it!
Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
Im doing kagels to the beat of Christmas music... "Jingle Bells" is hard. Try it.
so this guy comes in from the patio covered in puke and says "we gotta go"...Yup u need to go is an understatement
I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
My last google search last night was 'vodka swimming pool'.
It's a lightpost hitting you in the head. Of course it's going to hurt the day after.
we've got reservations. ask for the eat a bag of dicks table
All I wanted was a hug. You dirty, dirty whore.
So on a scale of 1 to Friendship-Over, how mad would you be if a rando I brought home sharted on the shag carpet in the living room?
There's a woman at the bar holding a baby with one arm and doing shots of GM with the other. The baby is crying. I have lost faith in humanity.
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
I was sitting here smiling wondering why i'm so fucking happy at work. cookie has kicked in
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
Randomize
